When God delivered Israel from slavery, he led them to the wilderness where he made an everlasting covenant with them. God describes his covenant with Israel as a marriage. In Jeremiah 2:2 God says of those early days, “I remember the devotion of your youth, how as a bride you loved me and followed me through the wilderness, through a land not sown” (NIV). God commanded Israel to celebrate the anniversary of their deliverance each year with a festival, called Passover, and the anniversary of when they entered into covenant with God in the wilderness at the festival of weeks, also known as Pentecost. Each of God’s appointed festivals points to Jesus and is fulfilled by Jesus, God’s covenant keeper.
At Jesus’ last Passover supper, he proposed a new covenant that would extend beyond Israel to the whole world. He invited us to enter into what is essentially a marriage covenant with God that lasts through all eternity. Just as a bridegroom (or groom) in Jesus’ day would propose and then leave to get a house ready for his bride, Jesus told his disciples at the last Passover supper that he was going to prepare a place for us and would return to take us to be with him. When Jesus returns, he is coming for the church, his bride. According to Revelation 21:2, the new Jerusalem that he has prepared for us comes down from heaven dressed beautifully as a bride. At that time, we will be invited to a wedding supper to celebrate that we’re no longer in a long-distance relationship with Jesus in which we communicate with him in prayer. We will finally see him face to face!
Genesis 2 reveals that God’s plan for marriage is for a man and woman to become one flesh in a covenant that lasts for life. Does God ask us to have a greater love for our spouse than Jesus has for his bride, the church? Of course not! If God commands us to forgive our spouses continually and faithfully love each other until death, why would we believe Christ’s love for us is fickle and could be withheld when we have a bad day? Jesus promised to never leave or forsake us. While we have free will to walk away from God (which the Bible calls apostasy), he does not break covenant with his bride.
In Mark 10:9 Jesus declares God’s intention for the marriage covenant: “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate” (NIV). Our covenant bond with God is just as strong. In Romans 8:38-39 Paul asserts, “I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. 39 No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Friend, you are securely loved!
When God makes a covenant with us it is forever, just like marriage is meant to be for life. When “cutting” a covenant in ancient times, both parties would walk through the cut halves of animals to signify what would happen to them if they broke the covenant. When God made a covenant with Abraham in Genesis 16, he alone passed through the cut halves. He took the responsibility upon himself to keep his promises and fulfill Abraham’s part of the covenant. He did this through Jesus who is both God and man. God promised Abraham his descendants would inhabit Israel forever. When God brought the Jews back into the land again in 1948, just as he promised in Amos 9:14-15, it stood as a reminder that God keeps his covenant promises. God is still faithful to Abraham, and he is faithful to keep his covenant with you forever – for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health.
Ephesians 5:25-27 describes how Jesus loves his bride, the church. “He gave up his life for her 26 to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. 27 He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault.” A bride traditionally wears white which is symbolic of being presented to her husband as a virgin who is pure. However, we were not pure when we came to Christ. We were stained with sin, so Jesus gave up his life for us, demonstrating his love by dying on a cross. He made us pure by cleansing us with God’s word. How?
In John 15:3 Jesus says, “You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you” (NIV). The word for clean is the Greek “katharos,” which means pure, clear of responsibility, innocent. How does Jesus speaking a word make us holy and clean? In John 5:24 Jesus says, “I tell you the truth, those who listen to my message and believe in God who sent me have eternal life. They will never be condemned for their sins, but they have already passed from death into life.” Why does this matter? Because you are not making yourself pure and holy for Jesus; he makes you pure and holy when you receive his message of repentance and believe that he is God’s Son, the Christ/Messiah of Israel. That’s what qualifies you to be blameless, without blemish in his sight. That’s what makes you a pure bride.
If Jesus is the one who makes us a pure bride, what is our response as his bride? After declaring that we are made clean by the word Jesus has spoken, he then says, “Remain in me” (John 15:4). Remain in his message of repentance from sin and selfishness. Remain in forgiveness by forgiving others. Remain in daily relationship with the Father, Son, and Spirit. Remain devoted to Jesus and free of affection for the false gods of the world. Remain in love by demonstrating love for others. Sounds a lot like a marriage. In John 15:9 Jesus says, “I have loved you even as the Father has loved me. Remain in my love.” This is such a powerful statement of the love Jesus has for his bride. Just think about how much the Father has loved Jesus who perfectly obeyed him and always brought him glory. That’s how Jesus loves you! Our response to Jesus’ love is to remain rooted in it.
In Ephesians 3:17-19 Paul is praying for the church to get a revelation of the love of Jesus so that “your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. 18 And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. 19 May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.” God’s love for us is like the Grand Canyon. It’s so deep and wide you can’t fathom it and could never see the end of it. Jesus descended to hell to rescue us from death and bring us up to heaven to be with him for all eternity. That is how deep and high his love is! Psalm 103:12 says God removes our sins from us as far as the east is from the west so we can enjoy a spacious place of joy in his presence. Though we can’t comprehend God’s Grand Canyon love, when we experience it through daily relationship, we are transformed by it and made complete with fullness of life and power.
The bridal identity is how we remain rooted in the love of Christ. By remaining in the revelation that we are securely loved forever and that Jesus desires an intimate relationship with us, we overcome the temptation to focus on self. In a godly marriage you die to self so that you can put the needs of the other first for the sake of love. Jesus demonstrated on the cross that “there is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” (John 15:13). Just as a bridegroom paid a bride price to the bride’s father in biblical times, Jesus purchased us with his blood so that we could be with him forever in his Father’s house. Isaiah 54:5 declares that, “your Creator will be your husband; the LORD of Heaven’s Armies is his name! He is your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel, the God of all the earth.”
Mutual sacrifice for the good of the other person is a foundational principle of marriage. We love and sacrifice because Jesus first loved us and sacrificed his life for our benefit. Most often, the sacrifice we offer Jesus is simply our willingness to put his desires above our own. In the same way that I ask my husband, “What do you want to do today?” and consider his desires before making plans, I want to start each day by asking Jesus, “What do you want to do today?” We respond to Jesus’ love for us by making time in our day to hear his thoughts, remember how much he loves us, and join him in his work.
Identity Puzzle Piece: If Jesus is the new Adam, and we are his bride, what does that make us? The new Eve!
When Jesus was crucified, blood and water poured out of his side. The Bible tells us that the life of an animal is in its blood. Jesus’ lifeblood fell onto the ground from which man was formed along with the living water of the Spirit who gives us life. Just as Eve came from Adam’s side, we were born of the Spirit which flowed from Jesus’ side, redeeming creation so we could be joined to Christ. Genesis 2:24 tells us that when a man is joined to his wife, the two become one flesh. Ephesians 5:32 says, “This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one.” Paul explains how we’re one with Jesus in 1 Corinthians 6:17: “The person who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with him.” By receiving Jesus’ Spirit, we are made one with Christ as his bride. The church is the new Eve for the new Adam.
The central faith statement of the old covenant is Deuteronomy 6:4 which describes God as “echad,” a unified One. The mystery of marriage is two individuals who function as a unified one, the way the Father, Son and Spirit function as One. The Spirit joins with our spirit so that we become a unified one with God. This is why Jesus says in John 15:5 that apart from him we can do nothing. When we accept Jesus’ covenant proposal, we receive the gift of the Holy Spirit who is like our engagement ring. 2 Corinthians 1:22 says that God “set his seal of ownership on us, and put his Spirit in our hearts as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come” (NIV). The Holy Spirit seals our covenant and becomes a sign that we belong to Christ. He is the one who keeps us blameless until Jesus returns, continuously guiding us into truth. By believing and walking in truth, obeying the Spirit of truth who lives in us, we remain a unified one with God.
The Mezuzah is on every doorway in fulfillment of the command to write God’s laws on your doorframes. The scroll contains Deuteronomy 6:4, the call to worship God as One. Traditionally, God’s people touch their lips and then the Mezuzah as they pass through every doorway as a sign of love for God as his covenant people. Like my wedding ring, God’s Torah was the seal of the old covenant and God’s Spirit is the seal of the new covenant through Christ.
Jesus promised, “I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever” (John 14:16, ESV). By receiving the Spirit as our Helper, we’re now joined to Jesus as his helper, his beloved bride whom he loves. In Genesis 2:18 God says, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” Eve was made as Adam’s helper to help him rule over the earth and cultivate it as one who is like him. Let that sink in. By receiving the Helper, the Holy Spirit, we are being made into a helper who is just right for Jesus, the new Adam. When Jesus returns to reign over the earth the way God originally planned for Adam and Eve to reign over it, the bride of Christ will reign with him as his helper. This is how God is redeeming the earth and restoring his original vision for mankind.
However, you and I are not individual brides; we all together make up the bride of Christ as one body with Jesus as our head, unified by his Spirit. We are made complete through our union with Christ, which also makes us part of his family that continually grows. Just as children are the fruit of marriage, God’s Spirit produces fruit through our union with Jesus that causes the seed of faith in us to grow and multiply as we share the good news. Like Adam and Eve, we are blessed to be fruitful and multiply to fill the earth with the knowledge of God’s glory.
Christ, the Bridegroom, in me: In John 15:10 Jesus tells us how to remain in his love. “When you obey my commandments, you remain in my love, just as I obey my Father’s commandments and remain in his love.” Every command of Jesus is rooted in love for God and people. We remain connected to his love by doing the same loving things Jesus does because that’s how Jesus demonstrated his love for the Father. In Matthew 25:34-40 Jesus tells us that whatever we do for the poor, hungry, homeless, and oppressed, we are doing for him personally. Everything Jesus did for us was out of love for us and for the Father, and everything we do for others shows our love for Jesus. When I serve the poor in my community, I feel Jesus’ love for them flowing through me which makes me love him more.
Revelation 19:7-9 reveals that all the things we do out of love for Jesus will be made visible as clothing when Jesus returns for his bride. “’For the time has come for the wedding feast of the Lamb, and his bride has prepared herself. 8 She has been given the finest of pure white linen to wear.’ For the fine linen represents the good deeds of God’s holy people. 9 And the angel said to me, ‘’Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the wedding feast of the Lamb.’” The good deeds we do demonstrate belief that we are Jesus’ bride. We don’t do good deeds to earn salvation just like a bride doesn’t make a wedding dress to get a husband. She makes it because she’s a bride! In Matthew 22, Jesus tells a wedding parable in which only those with the proper wedding clothes will be allowed to enter. Galatians 3:27 says that “all who have been united with Christ in baptism have put on Christ, like putting on new clothes.” The Father clothes those who have died to sin and been joined to Christ by giving us his Spirit who clothes us in Jesus’ righteousness. God’s goodness flows out of us as good deeds that will be made visible one day as clothing. Amazing!
When I got married, we merged our money (which wasn’t much) into one joint account. Everything I have belongs to my husband and everything he has is mine. In John 16:15 Jesus says, “All that belongs to the Father is mine.” Then in verses 23-24 he says, “I tell you the truth, you will ask the Father directly, and he will grant your request because you use my name. 24 You haven’t done this before. Ask, using my name, and you will receive, and you will have abundant joy.” What if we believed that we could give the Father a signed check from Jesus to withdraw funds from his inheritance for anything we need because we are his bride? We would have abundant joy! That’s exactly what Jesus has done for his bride so we can be his helper. God the Father “has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ” (Ephesians 1:3). We have already received every blessing; we just need to ask for what we need with faith that it’s ours because we’re united with Christ.
In John 14:21 Jesus says, “Those who accept my commandments and obey them are the ones who love me. And because they love me, my Father will love them. And I will love them and reveal myself to each of them.” Just as my father-in-law welcomed me into his family because I love his son, the Father is pleased to receive us as sons and daughters because we love Jesus and do what pleases him. In Exodus 21:9 we discover that one of the stipulations God gave in the law was that if a man purchased a slave girl as a wife for his son, she must be given full rights as a daughter. When Jesus redeemed us from slavery to sin, the Father gave us to Jesus as his bride which means we have also been given full rights as children of God. The Father loves us because we love Jesus. Not only are we received by the Father for loving Jesus, but Jesus promises to reveal himself to us.
Through the Spirit who lives in us, Jesus reveals his love and speaks to us, sharing mysteries. When I come to the Lord in prayer, I often ask him what he wants me to know. A picture will come to mind, and the Lord will ask me what I see (with my mind’s eye). He’ll then begin to speak to me about my life, drawing parallels to the picture. For instance, one time I saw a picture of the earth from the perspective of space. The Lord then asked me how I perceived myself. I saw myself as very tiny, 1 in 8 billion people, not very significant. Then the Lord asked me where I was. I realized I was seated with him in heavenly places, as promised in Ephesians 2:6, talking to the God who created the heavens and the earth! When I became aware of my proximity to the Lord, I suddenly felt very honored and special. The Spirit reveals God’s love to us so we remain rooted in love.
When Jesus prayed for his disciples in John 17:26 he said, “I have revealed you to them, and I will continue to do so. Then your love for me will be in them, and I will be in them.” Intimacy and ongoing revelation of God’s love is a promise to those who are in covenant with Christ. The fact that we get to have a daily relationship with Jesus should thrill our souls because there’s so much he wants to share with us. In John 14:23 Jesus promises, “All who love me will do what I say. My Father will love them, and we will come and make our home with each of them.” When we tune our hearts to listen, we hear his voice inside us because that’s where he has made his home. We are now God’s temple on the earth where his Spirit dwells inside us until we go to the heavenly home Jesus has prepared for us.
We are made new creations by receiving God’s Spirit so we can be Jesus’ helper. Jesus withholds nothing from his bride. He loves us perfectly, even when we’re a hot mess. He calls us his friends and shares mysteries with us by his Spirit. Jesus invites us to partner with him in ministry and provides everything we need from his inheritance. He leads and we follow because we trust in his perfect love and wisdom. We delight in revealing him to others just like a bride can’t shut up about the one she loves. The more time we spend with him, reading his love letters to us in scripture and listening to his voice in prayer, the more we learn what he loves and desire those things because we love him. I serve my husband not because I am his servant, but because I love him and it gives me joy to bring him joy. Our identity in Christ as his beloved bride shapes how and why we do the works we do: all for love.
Identity Declaration: I declare that I am chosen by Jesus to be his bride, securely loved on my best day and my worst day. I belong to him in covenant, and nothing can separate me from his love. I walk the narrow road of purity because it is a wedding aisle taking me straight to the arms of my beloved Savior. I desire to be where my Bridegroom is and join him in his work because he loves me and I love him. The Spirit of God is clothing me as a radiant bride, helping me to be a helper of Jesus.
Reflection: How can I love my spouse (or the bride of Christ, if single) as Christ, my Bridegroom, has loved me?
The Word Remaining in Me:
- Read John 15:15. How is seeing yourself as a bride or friend of Jesus different from simply relating to him as a master and servant? Read Isaiah 62:1-5 and hear Jesus speaking these words over you since the bride in Revelation comes down as the new Jerusalem. Do you believe God rejoices over you “as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride” (v. 5)? If not, is it based on your feelings about yourself rather than scripture? Ask the Holy Spirit to give you a revelation of the Father’s delight in you simply because you love his Son.
- Read Ephesians 4:17-32 in which Paul describes what a pure bride looks like. Why does lusting for the things of this world grieve the Holy Spirit, the covenant seal given to us to help us be a pure bride who is fully devoted to Jesus? Ask him if there’s anything that is competing with your love for Christ.
- Read Matthew 19:3-12. Why is keeping the marriage covenant important to God? How does Jesus view marriage and sexuality? How does focusing on Jesus’ covenant love for us help us love our spouse or live in purity if we’re single?
- Read 1 John 4:16-19 which describes the process and outcome of being perfected in love. What’s the difference between having perfect behavior and being perfected in love? How are we perfected in love? (Hint: Read each chapter’s “Reflection” question.) How does perfect love cast out fear of punishment?
Remaining in Love: Has the Lord given you a new revelation of his love for you this week? Why not spend some time just worshipping him and thanking Jesus for loving you? We can only offer Jesus our sacrificial love and praise in the midst of trials this side of heaven, which is why it’s so precious to him. Ask the Holy Spirit to bring to mind a love song for Jesus or choose one from the list below and sing it to him from your heart. Let love rise up in response to his love, flowing from your heart to his. Picture him smiling and holding your hands as you sing like a bride to her husband on her wedding day. This life is a dress rehearsal for the marriage of Jesus and his bride. (If this is hard, ask the Holy Spirit why and let him minister to you.)
Bonus Online Content
Click here for a PDF of the Small Group Discussion Guide and Fun, Interactive Family Lesson
Worshiping From Your Identity as the Bride of Christ:
- Click here to worship in response to Jesus’ invitation to intimacy (“Lord I Give You My Heart” by Benjamin William Hastings)
- This second song is a bit unconventional and is not a worship song, but I feel led to share it with you. Once, when I asked the Holy Spirit what grieves him, his response was when the bride of Christ loves things from the world more than Jesus. My mind went to something I had been holding onto and tears came to my eyes as I realized I needed to lay it down completely. That’s when the Holy Spirit brought this song to mind of a jilted lover who has been told by the woman he loves that she loves someone else. When you read God’s letters to Israel in Hosea and Ezekiel about Israel’s unfaithfulness as his bride, you hear the same pain in God’s voice. God lowered himself and died for us to demonstrate his desire for intimacy with us. As you listen, let the Spirit reveal Jesus’ heartbreak when his bride loves things more than him. (“At This Moment” by Billy Vera and the Beaters)
- Click here to consecrate yourself to Jesus as a bride saying her vows on her wedding day (“Take My Life” by Chris Tomlin)
Identity Scriptures to Memorize and Pray:
Thank you, Jesus, for loving me while I was still a sinner and inviting me into covenant with you. I am secure in your unfailing love. Thank you, Father, for blessing me with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms because I have been united to Christ. You are my Creator and Redeemer who has chosen me to belong to you forever out of your righteousness, justice, love and compassion. You have clothed me in Christ as a bride, draping me in a robe of his righteousness. Purify me, Holy Spirit, so that I may be a beautiful bride and helper suitable for Jesus. Help me to love others the way Christ faithfully loves me.
“All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ” (Ephesians 1:3).
“For your Creator will be your husband; the LORD of Heaven’s Armies is his name! He is your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel, the God of all the earth” (Isaiah 54:5).
“I will betroth you to me forever; I will betroth you in righteousness and justice, in love and compassion” (Hosea 2:19).
“And all who have been united with Christ in baptism have put on Christ, like putting on new clothes” (Galatians 3:27).
“I am overwhelmed with joy in the Lord my God! For he has dressed me with the clothing of salvation and draped me in a robe of righteousness. I am like a bridegroom dressed for his wedding or a bride with her jewels” (Isaiah 61:10).
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